Local news highlighting offices adding massage parlors, nap rooms, and golf simulators to lure workers back to the office.
Want me back in the office? Count my commute time as work time. That’s it. That’s all.
@bikepedantic yeah, that and a Metro accessible office would do it for me!
@bikepedantic I can't think of a more powerful disincentive to go into the office than the presence of a massage parlor
Would I like a massage? Sure!
Would I like it at work, alongside my colleagues? OMG no. Never.
I think I have permanently traumatized myself with the image that just popped in my head.
@DrTCombs right? and imagine, getting a little tense in a meeting, and a colleague or boss suggesting, "you should go catch a massage." nononononononono
@bikepedantic I just threw up in my mouth
the thought of napping with my colleagues is similary appalling. And golf is dumb.
@DrTCombs @bikepedantic Oddly it's actually OK? I've worked at two places that did this and the biggest issue, by far, was actually finding an open appointment as the masseuses were inevitably booked for weeks in advance. (I say this as someone who's got almost 16 hours of massage credits sitting unused)
The massage staff is also inevitably *far* better about issues of privacy, personal space, and boundaries than a lot of management. They just don't put up with the creepy stuff people imagine.
@DrTCombs @bikepedantic The biggest issue with having massage available at work is that the company uses it as a perk ("oh, have an hour of massage time!") but so over-books the service that in practice it's not a perk at all.
@wordshaper @bikepedantic see, all I can think of is what's going on in the minds of (some of) my colleagues when they see me walking about of the work massage place.
when I was pregnant, I asked for a pat-down from TSA instead of having to go through body scanner, and the comments I got from onlookers afterward about the supposed thoroughness of my search still grosses me out.
@DrTCombs @bikepedantic Fair worry. Having the service does get normalized really quickly, with folks generally not saying they're getting one just... booking time on their calendar and doing it like any other random meeting. Since it's always done somewhere private (the masseuses will insist on this) nobody sees it happening either.
People gonna people, no matter what you do, so it's still possible someone'll be a jerk about it but it's a lot less likely than you'd expect.
@wordshaper @bikepedantic I'd be down if the LMBT made house calls. But I guess that defeats the purpose.
@bikepedantic my position is simple: if you want people to be happy about returning to the office, give them offices to return to. I don’t mind my bike ride but my job involves concentration and cubicle farms are antithetical to that.
@acdha @bikepedantic and mine is flex space on top of that. So not even a cubicle to call my own.
@acdha @bikepedantic This is also the way.
@bikepedantic “Commute time is unpaid labor” has long been one of my more radical opinions.
@bikepedantic This is the way.
@bikepedantic I’ve worked at one of those “cool” offices before with perks like these, and nobody used them. Turns out, most places don’t have a culture where recreating on the job is actually encouraged, and companies feel no incentive to manufacture that kind of culture.